April Foolishness

April FoolThis month’s April edition is a little different from my usual April newsletters which always include one article featuring the world famous Prof Aillo, an expert polymath who’ve I’ve attributed to the discovery of the real reasons why we dream, the hidden properties of DNA, virtual diets, operating without touching patients and many more ground breaking revelations.

His findings are extensively documented on the Denmark-Doctor website. This year all but one of the articles written is attributable to the great prof – your task is to decide which one is not Foolish!

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Head Transplant

Gene Wilder - Young FrankensteinI read with great interest in the New Scientist about a surgeon who is pretty sure that in the near future he will be performing head transplants.

I’ve spent a fair amount of time wondering about this. After all it is remarkable what can be done today.

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Bionic Man

The Bionic ManI think I’m pretty fit for someone who receives mail from Saga.

I don’t smoke, I don’t drink any alcohol, I do drink lots of beetroot juice, I run lots, I eat healthily, I don’t have any chronic health problems and I don’t take any medication.

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Dignified Death

Dignified DeathThe government knows that most health clinicians are incapable of thinking for themselves.

The cynic in me feels that this is just part and parcel of living in a nanny state which seeks to control all aspects of our lives. I have learnt over the years that whenever a government (of any colour) says that one thing will happen, it invariably means the opposite.

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Standing Room Only

Standing Room OnlySome of you may think that the new décor in my room is merely a device to get you in and out of the surgery quickly.

Let me reassure that this is not the case. The fact that the desk, chairs and couch have all been removed and in its place is a chest high work table and an exercise conveyer belt is in your best interests as well as mine.

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Shop a DocYou may think this is the latest initiative from Amazon to take over health care.

However their initiative to fly ‘doc drones’ to your front door and beam back your medical info to ‘House’ their health super computer is still in its infancy and not being trialled in the UK until next year.

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Foolish Answer

Dignified DeathHopefully you realised that my rant about allow natural death forms wasn’t an April Fool.

But the government has tried to name and shame GPs, the New Scientist did (unbelievably) publish a non-April fool article about head transplants.

My poo may indeed be a really invaluable treatment in the future and there are a number of forward thinking organisations who have introduced walking treadmills to improve the health of their employees.

So the irony is that the only April Fool should have been about my centenarian patient who rest home proprietors were really distressed that she should die without her ‘allow natural death form’!

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Books Of The Month

Books of The MonthMy first book of the month is Jonah Lehrer’s excellent read ‘The Decisive Moment’.

He pulls together lots of fascinating research in neuroscience to explain how we make decisions.

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